i-think Twenty-Two

Now with more coherency.

The New Commandments

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After reading about the decline in religious standards it became apparent that the 10 Commandments were quite old and not ready for our modern lifestyles. Therefore, we at The Mill put forward some new Commandments, or ammendments if you like to bring the Commandments to the 21st Century (at this point I shall point out that I am aware that the Jewish faith has 613 commandments).

Traditionally the commandments have covered important things like don’t murder people (killing is ok, in certain circumstances) and don’t be jealous of your neighbour’s belt sander, but other things, like whether putting mobile phone towers on the top of a church is ok or not are skipped. Or at least, not specifically referred to.

So let’s start simply with one that has probably been missing for a while:

“Thou shalt not do stuff that is so obviously wrong there shouldn’t need to be a rule for it. Sheesh”

This is a particularly important catch all commandment with the intention of weeding out stuff that you should know is plain wrong, like encouraging reality telivision (which may already be covered by a series of Idol references). Of course, just to be sure that reality telivision is covered, we have a commandment just for it:

“Thou shalt not film "reality” and pass it of as entertainment."

I think that God would use the air quotes in there too.

“Thou shalt reveal your identity if you play a prank within a timely manner”

We all know why this one should be here.

Have you got any ideas for new commandments? Do you think I’ll probably suffer an eternity of torment for even thinking about this? Let me know, post a comment.